tribute to mom

I was blessed for 20 years to have two moms. yesterday my second mom left this world. it was quite unexpected as she was in great health and spirits having recovered from recent back surgery. she was 4" taller and quite proud of it. she was (mostly) free of the pain which had been part of her life for 30+ years. her formal relationship to me was mother-in-law but fortunately, we had a great relationship. Cheri would joke to others that her mother (or parents, I can't remember now) thought more of me than her. the truth was that their love is/was so complete that 'more' was not possible. i'm already seeing that it's gonna be hard to write about mom as a separate person from dad. they truly were one, and half of that one is no longer with us...

The short history is that I knew mom and dad stephens before I met Cheri. they were sponsors in the college group at Calvary and I was the missions point man. Cheri was away at school and work in Santa Barbara and they say they introduced us once when she was in town but neither of us remember it (?) So the Stephens were my friends from the very beginning of our knowing each other. As I hear more and more stories from others, this is a common thread- it's not long after they know you that you're friends. So Marilyn, being a travel agent, would help me with airfare when i would visit my parents or go overseas. When i decided to go to Austria to help rebuild a school, she convinced me to stay 4 more weeks and travel around. So I started in London, ended in Madrid and had a wonderful experience with great memories. Thanks mom.

When I met Cheri for the first time (according to us) it was in the context of meeting my friends daughter. That changed pretty fast as it became apparent that there was major mutual attraction :) Mom and dad made it real easy to be part of the family. I always felt total acceptance, respect and love. Thanks mom.

Mom was always 'on', always engaged. Mom had an opinion about almost everything and usually felt free to express it - and even change it midstream. She didn't have that stubborn pride that causes some of us to stick to our opinions long after they've been proven wrong. She would easily admit a faulty view and move on. Mom and I had some disagreements but they were always in the context of mutual love and respect so we didn't take our differences personally. I think it actually added to the respect we had for each other. She was up on current events and could talk to each of her grandkids with relevance. Thanks mom.

When we were in the hospital room on Sunday to say goodbye, the nurse brought us all some lunch. It was good and much appreciated but I thought - wow, this is pitiful compared to past Sunday afternoon feasts with Nana. She's here but not really and the food doesn't even begin to compare with the famous London Broil, or Dutch babies, or .... the list is long. Breakfasts at the cabin were truly epic. Thanks mom.

mom loved people and had special place in her heart for foreigners. her and dad served and ministered to countless students here and overseas over years and years of their faith journey. mom had the obvious gift of hospitality and leveraged it through God's strength to bring many closer to Him. she was a model of sacrificing to serve. When she endured the back pain for 30+ years, she would wince in pain imperceptibly, almost constantly, yet without complaining. When she was close to the end dad put his hand on her head, looked in her face and said "well done good and faithful servant, enter into the joy of your master". yeah. thanks mom

a life like moms can't really be summarized. at least by me. too much. if i had to in one sentence it would be something like "she truly lived and engaged those around her to do the same". Thanks mom.

Thanks for everything. It was a pleasure to know you. To be loved by you. to be part of your family. To eat at your table. To rest in your house. This sounds familiar... and it does give me a taste of heaven. I can only imagine how your reunion was yesterday. Good bye...for now.