I've developed a habit over the past couple of months or so of connecting with God before I get out of bed. As soon as I realize that I'm still alive and still me and have a day in front of me, I think/pray something like- "Good morning, Father. Thank you for a new day, thank you for my life, thank you for working in me and around me and help me to see others the way you see them, help me to see my circumstances and opportunities the way you see them. My life is all yours and I want you to rule me and let me know when I'm not cooperating. I need you desperately in every way and want others to see you better through me. Thanks..."
What exactly started this I'm not sure but it's been a combination of learning (in an experiential way)that I was designed to be connected to God. Any thought, words or action that expresses independence is absolutely dysfunctional. Another learning is that it really is possible to pray without ceasing. Essentially the same as being/staying connected but in a more conscious way - the fact that every thought I think can be prayer. If I'm connected (and being connected properly is to be aligned-to know who the boss is, acknowledge it and embrace it)then my thoughts are connected.
The experience of waking up every day is like pushing the 'reset' button on life to a small degree. The vast majority of days prior to my new habit started with some version of this in my head after and in between hitting the snooze button "oh boy, already morning, I'm so tired I wish I could call a timeout on life and just catch up on my sleep- oh well, what's on my plate today? (people, projects, plans, priorities follow in jumbled stress)Do I have time to read my bible? not if I want to get 7 more minutes or make it to the meeting on time. I better get up-I wish it was Saturday- Okay, here it goes...." Not much excitement, not much hope, not connected- just out on my own power...and insecure, anxious, and stressed OR if things seem to all be "going my way" at the moment-I'm proud and pompous. Either way, less than fully human and not attractive at all.
Why did it take me this long to figure this out????
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Fully human
I just spent 3+ days at a gathering at Mt. Hermon with Cheri, good friends and a group of people on a journey. The journey is the same for us all, yet takes us down different roads. I’d love to be able to summarize it in a sentence or even a paragraph but….so….OK- I’ll give it my best and try real hard not to use worn out cliches. Most of us come from the Christian religion and we have seen it become in many ways just that- another religion with the associated rules, rites, guilt, shame, subculture, expectations, who’s who, are you in or out, etc. Many have come to a point of being tired- tired of playing the game. Frankly, tired of ‘doctrine’, tired of living up to the expectations of the rule-keepers, tired of religion. So we dream and we let our well trained minds out of the ‘religion’ box and ask “what did God have in mind when he made us? What does it mean to be fully human? Is that congruent with the ‘abundant life’ or ‘eternal life’?” In other words, did God create us to play a type of waiting game- sticking it out and sucking it up in this life while we wait for that next one? Does human = bad?
The one example that seemed to get more play than others had to do with appearances. One man’s story about his senior picture that had been airbrushed and how he wanted that picture to represent him even though it was the most unlike him. The idea is that we (and especially I) want to project an image that is better than reality. We want to show our ‘good’ side and keep the other side(s) hidden, secret. Someone has said “you are only as sick as your secrets”. And so, part of living in real community is not hiding, but revealing. Not being ashamed of our humanity but exposing all of it- the good, the bad, and the sinful. Confessing to each other is God’s way. It’s healthy. It’s functional- highly functional. Must be how we were made. The more that I keep it to myself, the more unrealistic I am and want others to be about me. Not good=not healthy=not functional=not the way were made.
(I had a feeling this wouldn’t be short) Being the visual type I came to view my life as a pipe- like a pipe that carries water, say…in a fountain. I function best when the water can flow unimpeded through me. So what people notice as they see the fountain is the water, not the pipes that carry the water. The best that I can offer is to be a clean, clear channel for the living water to flow. Anything that hinders the flow or draws attention to the pipe is not fully functional- in fact dysfunctional. My 'pipe' is not identical to any other pipe so the fountain flowing through me will be unique- the expression of Christ living through me will look different than anyone else. Not only is that OK, it's by design and it's the mosaic that makes the body so beautiful (when it's functioning) I just remembered a song from college days "I got a river of life flowing out of me.."
Other thoughts from the weekend:
Heidi (who has adopted 7 boys – 3 from Africa) waking up to pray “God help me, there is no way I can pull this off under my own power” before she rolls out every morning.
Kelley talking about counting the cost and realizing that when we don’t have enough on our own- to negotiate the terms of peace, which in our case with God means full surrender.
The one example that seemed to get more play than others had to do with appearances. One man’s story about his senior picture that had been airbrushed and how he wanted that picture to represent him even though it was the most unlike him. The idea is that we (and especially I) want to project an image that is better than reality. We want to show our ‘good’ side and keep the other side(s) hidden, secret. Someone has said “you are only as sick as your secrets”. And so, part of living in real community is not hiding, but revealing. Not being ashamed of our humanity but exposing all of it- the good, the bad, and the sinful. Confessing to each other is God’s way. It’s healthy. It’s functional- highly functional. Must be how we were made. The more that I keep it to myself, the more unrealistic I am and want others to be about me. Not good=not healthy=not functional=not the way were made.
(I had a feeling this wouldn’t be short) Being the visual type I came to view my life as a pipe- like a pipe that carries water, say…in a fountain. I function best when the water can flow unimpeded through me. So what people notice as they see the fountain is the water, not the pipes that carry the water. The best that I can offer is to be a clean, clear channel for the living water to flow. Anything that hinders the flow or draws attention to the pipe is not fully functional- in fact dysfunctional. My 'pipe' is not identical to any other pipe so the fountain flowing through me will be unique- the expression of Christ living through me will look different than anyone else. Not only is that OK, it's by design and it's the mosaic that makes the body so beautiful (when it's functioning) I just remembered a song from college days "I got a river of life flowing out of me.."
Other thoughts from the weekend:
Heidi (who has adopted 7 boys – 3 from Africa) waking up to pray “God help me, there is no way I can pull this off under my own power” before she rolls out every morning.
Kelley talking about counting the cost and realizing that when we don’t have enough on our own- to negotiate the terms of peace, which in our case with God means full surrender.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
unity through diversity
This sounds attractive and happens to be an ideal named on the coins of our country (in latin) and is also the ideal of the body and bride of Christ, the church.
There's the theory and then there's real life. If we all have the mind of Christ, we would not have divisions. (I originally put a ? after that sentence but then used the .) We would still have many styles of worship and 'denominations' I suppose, but it would never be an "us vs. them"
Having the mind of Christ is the challenge. This would not preclude our individual gifts, talents, preferences but it would "consider others more important than ourselves" and all the rest that we read in Philippians 3 and other passages.
I'm thinking that God must be grieved by the divisions that are a result of not having the mind of Christ. What can I do though about the whole world, or even the "Christian-(little Christ)" community? Well, I can affect everyone I come into contact with and if enough people did the same our communities, culture, and world would reach a tipping point. The kingdom at hand? I think so!
There's the theory and then there's real life. If we all have the mind of Christ, we would not have divisions. (I originally put a ? after that sentence but then used the .) We would still have many styles of worship and 'denominations' I suppose, but it would never be an "us vs. them"
Having the mind of Christ is the challenge. This would not preclude our individual gifts, talents, preferences but it would "consider others more important than ourselves" and all the rest that we read in Philippians 3 and other passages.
I'm thinking that God must be grieved by the divisions that are a result of not having the mind of Christ. What can I do though about the whole world, or even the "Christian-(little Christ)" community? Well, I can affect everyone I come into contact with and if enough people did the same our communities, culture, and world would reach a tipping point. The kingdom at hand? I think so!
Sunday, November 2, 2008
The ultimate intention
It's the name of a book that I'm reading (by DeVern F. Fromke). I found it in Cheri's grandmother's library over a year ago and have been reading it sporadically. I love to read and used to read one book at a time but lately I've been reading a few at once. The effects are synergistic and serendipitous so I just go with it and don't try to force the 'recipe'.
This particular book seems a little obscure and it has taken the longest to get through. I've read 8-10 completely since I've started "The Ultimate Intention" and I'm only 2/3 done. On a scale of potential life impact this book is around 9.5 so it's worth the slow go.
Today I read 5 principles which 'coincide' perfectly with my current thoughts. I use " because I understand that God controls these things in ways I don't understand (or try to force) but just accept in awe. Here are the 5 found on p. 124:
1) God's grace is demonstrated that we might be free from captivity, but this freedom is to be used for and unto His ultimate intention.
2) God always asks that which is impossible to the natural man in order that His people will be dependant upon divine, spiritual resources.
3) God designs all things to function properly under His control. He is not content to merely set us free, but longs to "turn our captivity"; that is, He longs to bring us back into His captivity.
4) Man must either submit to God's purposes or become captive to some other law. God's plan will not allow us to live long in liberty apart from law.
5) God's pattern is not spurts of consecration and dedication, but a consistent walk leading into a continuous unfolding revelation of His plan and purpose.
This particular book seems a little obscure and it has taken the longest to get through. I've read 8-10 completely since I've started "The Ultimate Intention" and I'm only 2/3 done. On a scale of potential life impact this book is around 9.5 so it's worth the slow go.
Today I read 5 principles which 'coincide' perfectly with my current thoughts. I use " because I understand that God controls these things in ways I don't understand (or try to force) but just accept in awe. Here are the 5 found on p. 124:
1) God's grace is demonstrated that we might be free from captivity, but this freedom is to be used for and unto His ultimate intention.
2) God always asks that which is impossible to the natural man in order that His people will be dependant upon divine, spiritual resources.
3) God designs all things to function properly under His control. He is not content to merely set us free, but longs to "turn our captivity"; that is, He longs to bring us back into His captivity.
4) Man must either submit to God's purposes or become captive to some other law. God's plan will not allow us to live long in liberty apart from law.
5) God's pattern is not spurts of consecration and dedication, but a consistent walk leading into a continuous unfolding revelation of His plan and purpose.
Friday, October 31, 2008
One thing
The synthesizer in me is always trying to simplify.
What would it be like if, instead of trying to remember a few hundred things every day, I could boil it down to 3 or 4? That's really attractive because it stresses me out to think I may be forgetting something. So there are many levels of application here: the most obvious, external is the to do list- calls to make, things to do, bills to pay, places to go, etc. My answer is to remember Outlook and my notebook. Outlook has appointments and general recurring tasks. The notebook has specific recurring tasks and somewhat of a journal. So I can "remember" thousands by just remembering 2 things. That was easy. It just involves the habit of learning to enter info into the appropriate document. Organization 101.
Now move to a more philosophical level. How can I remember all the "beliefs" and "ought to's" that I should? Since this is not a tangible, "check it off" realm- it's a bit more slippery but because it affects my life on a deeper level and drives the life of the paragraph above, it is essential that my 'system' for remembering here is very purposed. I'm not suggesting that I can put my spiritual life in a box with a system and be content. What I'm searching for is the "one thing" that is the core, the starting point, the foundation, the first grid which all succesive layers of the grid must be true to. It has boiled down to this for me: Be right with God. Boy, that sounded really profound. Here's my thought behind the word "right"- I can determine right from wrong based on design or original intent. God has made everything on purpose with a design and the best I can do is to be completely in line with that- right. The first "right" is that I was made to be in relationship with Him. Any sense, idea, or act of independence is flat out wrong. Because this is not the state that I was born into, I have to reprogram and acknowledge this on a continual basis. The first time that I "connected" was an amazing experience- the thought of being right where I was made to be was overwhelming in a good way. My nature is not to stay there though and so part of the "one thing" is to remind myself of this truth: I am desperate and hopeless without God, I am fully alive (what I was made to be) when He lives in me and through me. A mystery yes, but a true and right one. The fact that He designed us to recognize, desire, and enjoy this is true love- I'm so grateful right now just thinking of that.
The second part of the "one thing" is that, in our relationship we are not equals- he rules and i submit. In this relationship it's a beautiful thing. In others it gets a bad rap because no one is perfect and there is much abuse. The kingdom is all about ruling, it's all about soveignty, it's all about God being the creator and me being the creation. When this is as it should be, my life is right! The core is in place and so my preoccupation can stop about all the lists of do's and don'ts and shoulds and shon'ts (just go with it for the ryhme). I may be able to stop asking WWJD and actually observe Him through me.
That's the "one thing" for me. I need to be connected to and ruled by my Father, the King of Kings. It's just amazing that what I need I also crave and any other option is so empty.
What would it be like if, instead of trying to remember a few hundred things every day, I could boil it down to 3 or 4? That's really attractive because it stresses me out to think I may be forgetting something. So there are many levels of application here: the most obvious, external is the to do list- calls to make, things to do, bills to pay, places to go, etc. My answer is to remember Outlook and my notebook. Outlook has appointments and general recurring tasks. The notebook has specific recurring tasks and somewhat of a journal. So I can "remember" thousands by just remembering 2 things. That was easy. It just involves the habit of learning to enter info into the appropriate document. Organization 101.
Now move to a more philosophical level. How can I remember all the "beliefs" and "ought to's" that I should? Since this is not a tangible, "check it off" realm- it's a bit more slippery but because it affects my life on a deeper level and drives the life of the paragraph above, it is essential that my 'system' for remembering here is very purposed. I'm not suggesting that I can put my spiritual life in a box with a system and be content. What I'm searching for is the "one thing" that is the core, the starting point, the foundation, the first grid which all succesive layers of the grid must be true to. It has boiled down to this for me: Be right with God. Boy, that sounded really profound. Here's my thought behind the word "right"- I can determine right from wrong based on design or original intent. God has made everything on purpose with a design and the best I can do is to be completely in line with that- right. The first "right" is that I was made to be in relationship with Him. Any sense, idea, or act of independence is flat out wrong. Because this is not the state that I was born into, I have to reprogram and acknowledge this on a continual basis. The first time that I "connected" was an amazing experience- the thought of being right where I was made to be was overwhelming in a good way. My nature is not to stay there though and so part of the "one thing" is to remind myself of this truth: I am desperate and hopeless without God, I am fully alive (what I was made to be) when He lives in me and through me. A mystery yes, but a true and right one. The fact that He designed us to recognize, desire, and enjoy this is true love- I'm so grateful right now just thinking of that.
The second part of the "one thing" is that, in our relationship we are not equals- he rules and i submit. In this relationship it's a beautiful thing. In others it gets a bad rap because no one is perfect and there is much abuse. The kingdom is all about ruling, it's all about soveignty, it's all about God being the creator and me being the creation. When this is as it should be, my life is right! The core is in place and so my preoccupation can stop about all the lists of do's and don'ts and shoulds and shon'ts (just go with it for the ryhme). I may be able to stop asking WWJD and actually observe Him through me.
That's the "one thing" for me. I need to be connected to and ruled by my Father, the King of Kings. It's just amazing that what I need I also crave and any other option is so empty.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
The bridge
| Allow a few minutes afterward to ponder...
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Sunday, October 19, 2008
An interview on community
Jen Lemen was on the same plane to Africa that I was, but had a different itinerary while there. I got to know her on the plane and just found this interview with her about community. This is attractive and if the economic conditions speed this up, well then..... bring it on:
http://www.letterstomydaughters.com/2008/07/whats-your-idea-of-community-interview.html
http://www.letterstomydaughters.com/2008/07/whats-your-idea-of-community-interview.html
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